Beg for Me (DW Version)

( The Fifth Track of Issues )

I wonder if there's the same loyalty I pledge to others coming back to me. Are they going to be there when I really need them? Is there any one of them that really understands the way that I think, the way that I feel, the way that I am? Am I wanted? Am I needed? Am I really loved? When I'm down and out, these are the questions that I ask myself. The people in my life know without a doubt I'll be there for them, but who's down for me?

I don't ask a lot of my friends. The vast majority of the time, when my back is up against the wall, I don't even tell anyone. I just handle it myself. I handle all my problems alone. I don't like discussing or sharing them. I'm not the venting type either. I just do whatever needs to be done to push through. That's why when I do really need something, I expect those that I would drop everything for to be there for me. This is when people start showing their true colors. Some of them only care about their needs in the end.

I guess a part of me is afraid to find out that someone I care deeply for will refuse to be there for me in one of those rare moments that I reach out for help. "Who gives a fuck if my life sucks?" That feeling is followed by a lot of anger. People talk and talk and talk about how much they care and how they'll go for a friend in need. It's sickening to see those oaths become words without any meaning at all. "I just know one thing: I won't give up."